What Do you Need this Monday Morning? (Maybe a Laugh? May I offer Some Jackisms?)

Maybe you need coffee, or some sunshine, or some more ice melt (grrr, winter!) I really don’t know what you need. At the very least, you may need a chuckle. So I hope that reading some of these Jackisms (and a few Brennisms!) gives you a good laugh at the very least and that they brightens your day. As usual, the blurbs that I recorded are normal and the one’s that Paul recorded are in bold. Most of them are from 2012. Enjoy.


Today I told Jack that he needed to take a nap. “But I don’t want to take a nap!” Me: “Ok, well, you can just lay on your bed then.” Jack: “Thanks!! Can I read?” “No” “Can I sing??” “No” “Can I HUM???” “No” (Long Pause) Jack: “That really sounds a lot like a nap then.” : )


Out in public with the boys is always an adventure. For instance Jack just yelled across Wendy’s to Brenn, “I am going to eat your face off!!!” And I must just maintain a stoic “I don’t care what you think” face when every turns and stares. With little boys, you just have to own the crazy.


After getting angry at Brenn, Jack sulkily muttered at me “It’s your fault I got angry!” When I asked why (I wasn’t even in the room!) he said, “Well, you were the one who brought Brenn home and made him my brother.” : )


Paul is sitting the the chair opposite me. He is trying to finish a blog post. So, trying to concentrate. I just heard jack say, “excuse me papa…excuse me…papa, excuse me…EXCUSE ME!!! Papa!!!” and when Paul finally asked what jack wanted the answer was, “(exasperated sigh) I just wanted to tell you that I was going over to sit with mama so I won’t distract you! Ok? Ok papa?”


Cute quote from Brenn today. Me, “Why should I get you more cereal?” Brenn (batting his adorable eyes), “Becaaaaaause Mama….I am AWESOME.” Me, “Why are you so awesome?” Brenn, “Um, God made me awesome. And he made cereal.”


Aww. Me: to the little boy snuggled in my lap, “I love you to the moon and back.” Brenn: after a pause, “but I love YOU to the SUN!!!” Mothering isn’t easy, but the you get these moments and somehow it is all worth it.


After I sneezed jack looked at me and said “wow.” I told him that the accepted thing to say was “God bless you.” He paused and then declared “Papa, I can’t tell god what to do. That is wrong. Why don’t I say ‘I bless you’ instead? Is that ok?”


So we’re playing “doctor” and Jack tells me to take some medicine. “why?” I say. “Because,” he knowingly states, “you are aging Mama.” Um, what?


On the way home jack abruptly declares “mama, I will never call you fat.” I thanked him and then asked why he had decided not to use that particular adjective. “oh,” he said, “Papa told me that it was a bad word to use about you. He said that it was dangerous. So I will never say it. Ok?” Then as an aside, “…why is it a dangerous word??” Heheheh. That husband of mine is one wise man : )


Ok. This is hilarious. I just checked Brenn and put him in a sleeper that looks like a superhero suit. I asked,”Brenn, what is your superhero name?” He promptly shouted, “GOD!!!” Heheheh.


Jack just made up a story about dinosaurs. The main conflict was that the dinosaurs decided to eat all the bacon in the world and only leave us fruit to eat. He said it was a “very very very scary story.” I’m thinking that we should publish an illustrated copy : )


I see Jack running around the yard, flapping his arms and saying “tweet tweet tweet!” When asked why he is doing this, he promptly answers “Because I want all the birds to like me!” 


I just caught jack doing something he wasn’t suppose to do. After our conversation, a tearful, yet ever pragmatic jack looked at me and said, “mama, next time I want to take food without asking I will just have to make sure that I sneak around you more quietly!” hmmmm…thinking we missed the salient point of the conversation….


Jack: “Why did the chicken cross the road??” Me: “Why?” Jack: (quite enthusiastically and with accompanying violent gestures) “To take a hammer and smash your house to pieces!!!!!!!” Me: “Jack?! Why is that even funny?!” Jack: (innocently chuckling) “Oh Mama, it’s because chickens can’t carry hammers!”


Today I had the unfortunate task of changing Brenn I said “Brenn, you stink man! When are you going to start using the potty!” Brenn: “Hmmmm, um, I think in thirty days. Ok? Ok, Papa?” : )


(And probably one of my all-time favorite quotes…..)

While getting ready to go to someone’s house for dinner I quizzed Brenn on what type of responses to give to people. Me: “So if someone says hello, what do you say?” Brenn: “I say, ‘HI!!!!'” Me: “Good.” Brenn: “BUT, if someone walks towards me I run away, FAST, screaming ‘DON’T EAT ME!!!!!’ ” (Pause) Me: “No, we don’t do that…” Brenn: (sadly) “O.K.”

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