Megisms, Brennisms and Jackisms…When Laughing is Better than Crying (or being Frustrated : )

Sorry for the radio silence friends. I’d planned a small holiday sabbatical but then God decided to upend our life with the news that we would be moving to Alaska! Thus, the sabbatical changed into “I’ll get to the blog when I have a free moment.”

Ok, so remember when I said that I was struggling with the fact that God hadn’t given us a firm answer about his upcoming plans for us? Remember that sad, emotional post that I wrote? Remember when I said I’d be good with whatever the answer was but that I just wanted an answer? Well, God gave me the desire of my heart. In December, right before Christmas, we heard the news that we’d be moving north in “the spring.”

Ok, that’s cool (literally.) No biggie. I can roll with “the spring.” But then last week I found out that the Air Force interprets “the spring” as “you need to be moved up here by March 1.”

Ummm, say what now?

As you can imagine, there are many tasks which must be completed before moving a military family to Alaska. Having that take place within 6-8 weeks just super-charges the whole processes. It’s like relocation on steroids : )  We race though the days at a furious pace while lots of random actions that need to take place pop into my brain, willy nilly. “Find a house! Move out of this house! AH! Clean this house!! Go to the doctor! Are all the kids current with their shots? Taxes (ugh.) Buy snow gear! What kind of boots are best? What, there are bears wandering around up there?! Dentist visits! Paperwork (lots and lots of paperwork.) Military briefings? Public school? Homeschool? Private school? Drive? Fly? Ugh, shampoo these carpets! Repaint this room! One of our cars is dying…BUY A CAR! Snow tires? Chains? Purge these toys! Purge these clothes! Why do we have so many books?!! Buy another snow shovel! Insurance…change address…hold mail…make sure passports are up to date…change the oil in the car…AH!!!”

(That was my brain for about an hour on the morning of day one : )

But through the chaos, I can clearly see God walking a few step ahead of us, clearing the path and making our step more certain.  We’ve already met people who live in Anchorage and who are willing to be-friend us and answer all my crazy questions. We’ve found a fantastic realtor who is acting as our eyes and feet…via FaceTime I’ve already strolled through 8-10 houses! We’ve been able to schedule dentist and doctor appointments within days of calling and begging for a spot (a miracle in and of itself!) Actually, everything is going according to plan. It’s just going there quickly : )

So it really is cool. We’re cool. We’re calm(ish.) God’s got this and I just need to focus on doing the next right thing. He know the plans. He knows the path. He is good.

So onward to Alaska : ) Onward towards the new adventure.

(Also, laughter is a helpful stress reliever during moments of frustration. So I while sitting on the phone for a few hours one day last week, I scrolled through FB and collected all the “isms” from the past two years. Here are just a few from 2015. Enjoy!)

Meg comes bouncing from the kitchen into the living room. It clear from the liquid mustache above her lips she’s been drinking something. Me, “Meeeeegggg…..what have you been drinking?” Meg, “Uh….YES!!!” Me, “No…WHAT?” Meg, “OH! …I DRINKING YOUR COFFEE MAMA!!!!!!” Then giggles in a crazed voice as she runs in circles in front of me. During which episode remember that I’d left a half full iced coffee sitting on the kitchen table – within easy reach of enterprising young toddlers : P

Jack: (wailing) “mom!!! I have gum in my eyebrow and it hurts!!!”
Me: “why in the world is there gum in your eyebrow!” 
Jack: “well, I was chewing my gum and then I took it out and then I forgot that it was in my hand and then my forehead itched and then I scratched my forehead and then I got gum in my eyebrow!!” Sigh. This boy. 

While running from our car to the store due to the rain I heard Brenn excitedly yell, “Wow Mama!!! I didn’t know that you knew how to run!!!!” 
Hmmm, perhaps I need to get out(side) more : P

Meg was sitting on my lap, weeping over something not worth weeping over and to distract her I started talking about how much I love “a Meg.” Then I said, “and I love a Jack, and I love a Brenn…but do you know what I love most of all?!?…” (Shooting for “a Papa”) and Meg confidently yelled, “A COOKIE!!!” Sigh. Ok. Apparently it’s time to start dieting again : )

Me: (While walking up to Paul from another part of Macy’s Department store), “So where are the boys?” Paul: “Hiding amongst the bras” …Well…That’s something that I’ve never expected to hear.

Tonight Meg was having herself a little hissy fit and so I decided to give her helpful ultimatum. “Meg, do you want to go to bed? OR Do you want to stay up and play with toys?” To which she quickly replied, “Uh, No” and then tried to steal a cookie. Hmmmm, perhaps I need a lesson in negotiating skills.

Tonight Jack was facing the music with regard to a house rule he’d disregarded. After about 15 minutes of escalating “discussion” he finally stomped his foot, screwed up his face and growled, “REAL Moms aren’t mean to their sons. And you’re being SO MEAN. So I just have one question…” then, leaning forward and gesturing emphatically he yelled,”…ARE YOU EVEN MY REAL MOM!?!?” After which he turned away and dramatically put his head in his hands. Yeah, it was hard to stay course with my firm, stoic face at that point : ) (We did sort things out though and after a suitable consequence he came and apologized for “calling you not my real mom.” haha! : )

As Brenn sat at the kitchen table doing his homework he glanced over at me as I mopped the floor. Then he said (with great admiration) “Mama, you are the best cleaner I know. I bet you could get a job cleaning if you just tried a little harder.” Sigh.

True conversation in my house right now. 
Brenn: “Mom, I need to solve this problem, 1+X=8….so I need to figure out X.” 
Me: “Ok, well, what is 8-1?” 
Brenn: “7” 
Me: “What is 7+1?”
Brenn: “Um, 8.” 
Me: “OK, So…what is X???” 
Brenn: “Uh. 6???”  … Help me Rhonda….

Meg: “fruit snacks make me happy!”
Paul: “oh yeah? Well, what would make me happy?”
Meg: “um, just a salad, Papa. Salad.” 
Haha! Out of the mouths of babes! Time to get ready for his PT test : ) 

As we’re driving slowly down the main drag in Gulf Shore Brenn starts practicing his phonics skills. “H-oo-t-er-s. Hooters! That place is named Hooters! Hey mom! I’m reading!!” 

When you have to bring your three young children to a doctors appointment it’s no wonder that after taking your blood pressure (during which time one child starts stealing tongue depressors and another starts jumping in and off the scale) the nurse murmurs, “hmmmmm…seems a little high.” 

Anyway, I just offered to make waffles for a late breakfast/bunch and Jack looked up from reading and said, “Waffles!? Brenn, we should rejoice and be glad with a great gladness because our Mama isn’t making us eat cereal, again.” … So, yeah, since I’ve been a little under the weather the last two days, they’ve eaten cereal….alot. Heheh. Also, I wonder where he gets that snarky tone…. : P


  • Ashley says:

    Love this :-) I am so excited for you and your family and the new adventure ahead of you. My Mom has been to alaska and believes that it is exactly what Heaven looks like. Brenn will be truly missed and has been such an amazing first friend to Caleb. He is excited to have them become pen pals :-)

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